I wrote a lot about my experience at Anime Central this year, and with good reason; I had a good time and felt like I’d finally settled on reasonable expectations for a big convention. I previously attended the con five years ago, and my experience then was somewhat less positive. Part of it was due to the convention location – at that time the hotel and convention center were located pretty far away from any inexpensive food options and the weather wasn’t cooperating (obviously not the con’s fault, but it did color the experience). Also, the amount of travelling back-and-forth between convention buildings felt excessive.
The other reason why my prior experience wasn’t so great was my state of mind at the time. I was dealing with a failing relationship, and while hindsight has allowed me to accept that as something which needed to happen, at the time I was still bogged-down in a lot of misappropriated guilt and self-hatred. I’d also been getting guilt-tripped by my partner at the time – why was I running off to have a good time with other people when life at home was crumbling to dust? I suppose the answer was that a part of me knew that I needed my freedom, and the only way that I knew of to experience it was to forcibly rip myself away.
Most of the convention itself is a blur, not only because it was so long ago, but because I purposely tried to attend as many panels as humanly possible. Any down time was just another opportunity to stop and think about my situation, and I didn’t much feel like thinking that weekend. One panel in particular sticks out in my mind, however. I don’t recall the title, but it was presented by a school art teacher who talked about the kids in her class who “drew anime.” The main point of the panel was that, unlike many other art teachers, she didn’t discourage the “anime” kids from drawing what they wanted in her class. Her philosophy was that kids who start off drawing the things that they want to draw and who are inspired by the things that they enjoy, will continue to practice and build their skills, whereas those who are discouraged by their instructors and forced into believing their preferred style is trivial will eventually lose their joy in the process.
When I was in college I took several art classes, and even thought I might go for an art minor at some point. And I was one of those “anime kids.” Most of my drawing instructors were familiar with manga and anime, and at least humored me and encouraged me to do what I liked – so long as it fulfilled the requirements of the assignments. I even drew a humorous manga for one of my final projects in my second level drawing class. In my last year of school, however, my upper-level drawing instructor wasn’t quite so amused by my preferred style. I wasn’t the only person in class with an inclination toward anime or animation-influenced style; one classmate’s M.O. was to literally draw fan art on huge canvases, and another friend of mine was (and still is) heavily informed by Western cartoons. I felt like all three of us were constantly, though in not so many words, told to get serious and stop playing around. After a while, I stopped showing up to that class, and it’s kind of a miracle I managed a passing grade. It had become a terrible slog by that point.
I’m not arguing that young artists should never be pushed outside their comfort zone, just that it ought to be their own conscious choice on their own terms. I believe most will come around to expanding their horizons eventually, if they truly wish to make a career of their passion. When people are shamed into making that decision, though, and made to see the things they love as “less-than” by people who think that they know better, they’re likely to give up all together. I know that I took a long break from art and stopped pushing myself to improve, because I was made to feel like operating within my niche wasn’t going to take me anywhere useful.
I feel the same way about anime fandom. For a long time I’ve worked to be on top of all the new anime series as they’re released, and so my knowledge base is pretty large. I was there when anime went from being a niche fandom to a not-so-niche one with a lot of public awareness, and I’ve watched a ton of shows and movies (probably in the 500-600 range). There was a time in my life where I’d make fun of people who’d “only” watched stuff like Naruto, Bleach, and Dragon Ball Z (never mind that, between the three of them, that’s a ton of episodes). There was a big part of me that felt superior because I’d done the legwork of locating both older classics and shows that were hot off the presses. The thing is, though, aside from some earlier blips on the radar that were only evident in hindsight, my true, conscious anime starting point was Sailor Moon broadcast dubbed on American TV, one of the most basic “starter” anime for fans of my age group. I was lucky enough not to know anyone with the experience or inclination to bully me for my inexperience, and I managed to go on and expand my horizons partly because I didn’t have anyone at my shoulder trying to gate-keep my experience.
And there I was up on my high horse, rolling my eyes at DBZ fans and calling people “Narutards” under my breath.
I don’t know if my change in attitude necessarily coincided with my attendance at that teacher’s panel. I may very well just have started realizing how much of an ass I was being, and how detrimental it is to someone’s enjoyment of something it is to imply that the way in which they’re experiencing it is somehow wrong or incomplete. I’d also been at the receiving end of some video-gaming gate-keeping by then, and likely come to realize how upsetting that experience can be. Either way, her message still rings true for me and I think about it quite a bit both while I’m writing reviews and while I’m presenting information in person. While I don’t shy away from writing critical things about anime here in my own space, I try never to insult the fans who might like it. When I’m interacting with others I try to take care not to speak ill of the things they’re enthusiastic about. People dipping their toes into the anime fandom via a popular shounen series could go on to become long-time members of the anime fandom. That is, if we make sure not to harsh their squee.